Ross Goldberg's Backup Blog

Birthday Extravaganza

Today is the Color Princess' 5th birthday.  I can't believe she's 5 years old already! (Of course, from her demeanor, you'd sometimes think she was 11 or 12, but that's the subject for a whole different post.)

For her birthday today, CP gets an afternoon of Mom and Dad all to herself - Dee's sister is coming to babysit the Tenacious Bean so we can take CP to her first movie-theater movie (How to Train Your Dragon), followed by a trip to Chick-Fil-A for a special treat of chicken nuggets, waffle-fries, and a milkshake.  She's going to be so excited!

This wasn't all of the birthday celebration the CP got this year, though.  We had a surprise party for her earlier this week when all the family could get together - it was an absolute blast:

When the Color Princess walked in the door, she was blown away by the streamers and decorations my wife had put up while she was over at her cousin's house.  Here's the CP and her cousin posing in front of the fireplace decorations:

Posing in front of the decorations

She loved her birthday cards (this one lit up when you pushed a button) and her summer-themed presents (two swimsuits, a play sprinkler, and a giant wading-pool).

Showing off her sparkly, light-up card

Showing off her presents

She adored her cake (princess-themed, of course), and even her sister got into the festivities a bit.  Everyone had a great time, and the CP can't stop talking about how much she loved her birthday.  I think it was a hit, don't you?

The cake (princess-themed, of course)

The Bean gets into the decorations

The Friday Drabble - Episode 4

Friday Drabble

Fridays are the days I post one or two "drabble", the 100-word stories that test your ability to convey an entire story idea in an extremely brief format.  Feel free to join in and write your own 100 word stories on Fridays, and tag them with "friday drabble".  Link to them in the comments and/or on Twitter with the hashtag #fridaydrabble.

ALSO! Some of the drabble I am writing are part of the 100 Word Stories Podcast Weekly Challenge! Because of this, I will also post an audio recording of my reading of any challenge submissions.  Hope you enjoy!

---

Note - I had some fun with sound effects on this recording.  It was my first time playing with Audacity for something like this.  Let me know if you like it and if I should try to do something similar for future recordings!

All For the Want of a Horseshoe Nail

All For the Want of a Horseshoe Nail

Richard rushed across the room to his typewriter. Rolling in a sheet of clean white paper, he mumbled to himself as his fingers flew over the keys. His muse was in full force today, and he could feel this, his first novel, would be his masterpie-

*clunk*

With a cry, he pulled apart jammed keys, sobbing as one letter's head cracked cleanly off its rod. He tried to continue anyway:

".ucius .amed .achrymose .abradors .ackadaisica..y"

It was no use. He ripped the paper free and buried his head in his arms.

For want of an "l", the debut was lost.

Innovative Approach to Spam?

Not only are the spammers coming after you in blog comments as well as through your email, but now they're telling jokes!

I was cleaning out the spam comments on my blog when I came across one that I actually enjoyed - unlike the linkfarm/gobbledygook/viagra ads of most blog comment spam, this one contained a joke that was not half bad:

Moishe had been single for a long time. One day, he excitedly tells his mother that he’s fallen in love at last and he is going to get married. She is obviously overjoyed.

Moishe then tells his mother, “Just for fun, Mum, I’m going to bring over 3 women and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”

His mother agrees.

The next day, Moishe brings 3 beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they all chat for a while. Then Moishe turns to his mother and says, “Okay, Mum. Guess which one I’m going to marry?”

She immediately replies, “The redhead in the middle.”

“That’s amazing, Mum. You’re right. How did you know?”

“I don’t like her.”

Obviously these kind of comments still aren't going to make it onto my blog, but if the spammers can keep me laughing while I delete their comments, so much the better!

The Friday Drabble - Episode 3

Friday Drabble

Fridays are the days I post one or two "drabble", the 100-word stories that test your ability to convey an entire story idea in an extremely brief format.  Feel free to join in and write your own 100 word stories on Fridays, and tag them with "friday drabble".  Link to them in the comments and/or on Twitter with the hashtag #fridaydrabble.

---

Slip of the Tongue

"WHAT did you just say?" Charlene asked, interrupting John mid-response.

John mentally reviewed what he had said and blushed.  He fidgeted on the couch, staring at his hands, the floor, anywhere to avoid eye contact with his visibly irate girlfriend.

"What I meant is- Um, I mean- Well, I was just saying-" he stammered.

"You want to watch what you say next, honey.  You're already in the danger zone.  What comes out of your mouth is going to seal your fate."

John forced himself to meet her angry stare. "Uh, I'm really sorry?"

"You're STILL sleeping on the couch tonight."

Yet Another Netflix Junkie

Plethora of Netflix

This past Sunday, I bit the bullet and joined Netflix.  I'd been considering it for a while now, but between Mariser's recent post about Netflix coming to the Nintendo Wii and my own restlessness about being laid up on the couch with nothing but crappy movies available on the television, I decided now was the time to join up.  So I subscribed, set up an initial queue of about 50 movies I've been looking forward to seeing, and got There Will Be Blood in the mail on Tuesday.  Dee and I finished it last night and I packaged it up and mailed it back today.  Can't wait for the next movie to wing its way into my DVD player!

There Will Be a Damned Good Film

However, the part that really sold me on Netflix (over Redbox, which works out to just about the same price with no subscription commitment) is the Instant Viewing capability.  Any computer with a broadband connection can be set up to stream a subset of the Netflix movies for viewing with absolutely no wait.  This is where the service really shines - there are more than enough movies, miniseries, and television shows available for instant viewing that I've always wanted to see but never got around to watching when they came out.  Currently, I'm watching a half-hour episode of the British miniseries of Gaiman's Neverwhere at lunch every day.

Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere

My wife isn't quite as excited about the service as I am, but I think once I have the capability to play Netflix movies from a Wii across to our TV, she'll become a convert - if for no other reason than it'll allow her to find novel new shows/movies for the kids to watch when she needs a break, and she won't be subjected to the same episode of Imagination Movers or Phineas and Ferb that's she's already seen about a billion-and-two times before.

Business as Usual

This week is my first week back in the office after a lengthy period off for Achilles tendon surgery and recovery.  I'm still  wearing a walking boot, but ironically am not allowed to walk on my leg yet.  I'm still crutching around and fumbling along, but now I get to add some stretching exercises into the mix to try to stretch out my sewn-up tendon and get it back to snuff.

The office is the same as usual, and everyone's been very friendly and helpful while I'm getting back into the swing of things.  I have a desk full of papers to sort and either file or take action on.  I have an inbox full of emails to catch up on the same way.  I have a to-do list a mile long, but I'm feeling pretty good about the progress I'm making through all three, getting back on top of things and up to speed on the latest developments on my projects.

Stack O' Business Cards

Yesterday, I decided to take a break after lunch and found some business card origami ideas.  You see, I've got a box full of old business cards from my old job, and being a hoarder of useless crap, I held on to them when I moved down to North Carolina a few years back.  Over the years they've sat in a desk drawer, gathering dust until yesterday, when I discovered all the fun things you can do with business cards you don't care about anymore!

First, I made a business card cube, just to try my hand at basic origami.  Then I followed it up with the business card box, and filled it with some business cards that I'm keeping by my phone to use as scratch-paper during phone calls.  It took a little bit of time, but I'd label it about a 1.5/5 on a difficulty scale.

 

Business Card Cube and Box

I might follow up with a couple other origami crafts today at lunch.  I especially like the idea of some of the 3D shapes (tetrahedrons, octahedrons, etc) even though they look to be a little bit above my skill level at the moment.  But I've got a lot of cards to go through and practice with to get them right!

 

The Friday Drabble - Episode 2

Friday Drabble

Fridays are the days I post one or two "drabble", the 100-word stories that test your ability to convey an entire story idea in an extremely brief format.  Feel free to join in and write your own 100 word stories on Fridays, and tag them with "friday drabble".  Link to them in the comments and/or on Twitter with the hashtag #fridaydrabble.

ALSO! Some of the drabble I am writing are part of the 100 Word Stories Podcast Weekly Challenge! Because of this, I will also post an audio recording of my reading of any challenge submissions.  Hope you enjoy!

---

Looking For Work

Looking for Work

“And why, Mr....”

“Loki”

“Yes, Mr. Loki. Why do you think you'd be suitable for the Demigod position?”

“Well, I have plenty of deity experience from my last place of employment.”

“Yes, about that - it says here in your letter of recommendation that you were... a bit of a troublemaker?”

“Well, I pulled a couple practical jokes, but I wouldn't call that making trouble...”

“Yes, I see. And do you have anything that would prevent you from starting as early as next week?”

“Only Ragnarok.”

“Okay, thank you very much for your time, Mr. Loki. We’ll be in touch.”

---

Like a Candle in the Wind

Like a Candle in the Wind

They called him the Human Torch. He was like something out of comic books. Flames crawled all over his flesh, and little yellow and red tongues licked at his hair, but never ignited so much as a single strand.

They remember how he had to sleep on a ceramic bed, and left charred footprints in his wake.

They remember how he kept the local nursing home residents alive when the Blizzard of 2042 knocked out power for three weeks.

But then the CIA discovered he was an arsonist, and guilty of murder. And quietly, surreptitiously, the Human Torch got snuffed.

Advertising Blunders - The Legacy Way

You may think your company name sounds cool, but a few words of advice:

The Legacy Way?

When comparing two different techniques, "The Old Way" and your method, AKA "The Legacy Way" sound suspiciously similar.  In fact, you may not know this, but the word "legacy" actually implies your method is old, and possibly obsolete.  It certainly does not give one the impression that you are the the innovative, cutting edge, and successful process that you are trying to promote.

It's probably too late to change your company name, but I'd look at hiring a different advertising firm in the future.  They seem to be a bit of a legacy themselves.

Ross Reviews: Eight Cranes Perfect Steeper

The Eight Cranes Perfect Steeper
Perfect Steeper (Glass or Polycarbonate Model) - $29.99
Perfect Steeper Gift Set (Steeper with 3 tea samples) - $39.99

The Perfect Steeper

Serious tea lovers will tell you there's no substitute for brewing with loose teas. But although loose teas will brew up into a more flavorful, less bitter cuppa, they require extra equipment (usually some combination of teapots, infusers, strainers, and mugs) that would make it difficult (if not impossible) to carry around everything you need for a good-quality tea on the go.

The Eight Cranes Perfect Steeper is an innovative product hoping to change the mindset that loose teas cannot be brewed while on the go. The Perfect Steeper does a good job living up to its name - providing a compact, drip-free, and most of all, convenient means to brew loose tea on the go - all that's needed is access to hot water.

Perfect Steeper Stands Out By Design

The key to the Perfect Steeper is its innovative design that incorporates the infuser (where the tea steeping takes place) into the top portion of the unit. As you can see from the video below, unlike other steeping solutions on the market, you actually flip the Perfect Steeper upside down to allow the tea leaves to begin to steep in the hot water inside the "steeping chamber". When you feel the tea has steeped long enough, you turn the unit right-side-up, leaving you with perfectly brewed tea you can drink straight from the Perfect Steeper's 8 oz. drinking chamber.

The drinking chamber is an insulated, double-walled design that keeps your tea hot but doesn't burn your fingers. Both high-tempered glass and polycarbonate models are available to choose from (polycarbonate model has a glass interior chamber and poly exterior). In both models, the steeping chamber is composed of polycarbonate. All metal accents are stainless-steel and the the top lid is embossed with the Eight Cranes logo. All of the sections of the Perfect Steeper screw together into a leak-free cylinder that is 7.75" high, 2.5"� diameter (outer diameter).

Tea in Two Minutes

The Perfect Steeper is simple to use and did an excellent job with the two kinds of loose teas I had on hand (a black tea and an oolong tea). The steeping chamber is large enough to allow the tea leaves to infuse properly, and would even handle rolled or leafy teas just fine. I love being able to watch the tea as it steeps, and even though I use a clock to make sure I don't let the leaves steep for too long, you can almost tell just by looking at the shade of the tea when it's ready to be flipped back over.

The sections screw together nicely without any difficulty, and when you're ready to drink, the steeping chamber comes off and you set it upside-down, so there's no dripping mess! The drinking chamber is comfortable to hold and drink from; the thread for screwing it into the steeping chamber is set far enough back from the lip of the unit so as to not interfere with the drinking process whatsoever.

For those that like more than the occasional cup, please note that your loose tea leaves can be re-used up to 10 more times! Simply add more hot water and repeat the steeping process again. (Your mileage may vary depending on the quality of the tea leaves you're using, of course.)

The only complaint I have about the Perfect Steeper is that it isn't dishwasher-safe. The three individual parts (top lid, steeping chamber, drinking chamber) are all very easy to hand-wash, though, so I'm not too bothered by this factor of the product.

Is The Perfect Steeper for You?

The Eight Cranes Perfect Steeper is an excellent product for tea enthusiasts on the go. While it probably won't replace your existing loose tea brewing setup, it could easily be your primary brewing equipment if you're a casual tea drinker or are just getting into experimenting with loose teas. And for everyone else, it would make an excellent addition to your tea-making setup, and give you a simple, clean, and convenient method to brew tea while in unfamiliar territory.

Pros:

• The compact design allows one to steep, filter, and consume your tea in a single unit with no spills or mess.
• The glass double-walled design feels solid and pleasant to drink from (and stays hot without burning your hand).
• The Perfect Steeper doubles as your mug - no separate container required.
• Ample-sized polycarbonate steeping chamber allows you to watch the infusion process, and is the perfect size for tightly rolled teas that need room to expand.
• Easy to re-use your loose tea for multiple brewings without any additional mess or preparation.

Cons:

• It is not dishwasher-safe, so you must wash the three pieces by hand.
• It is not microwave safe (although I don't know why you would want to microwave it anyway).
• Be sure to get the polycarbonate version if you are worried about carrying around a glass container with you while out and about. I'm a bit of a klutz and this is a concern I have about the all-glass version.

---

Disclosure: I received a review sample of the Perfect Steeper from Eight Cranes, but chose to purchase it rather than send it back at the end of the review period.

Cut the Crap! Introducing TheCrapCritic Reviews on Twitter

In my family, I am notorious for choosing the worst movies for family movie nights.  It's almost a sure thing.  In fact, it happened so often over the years that I almost consider it my superpower to be able to choose to watch, out of all available selections, the worst movie possible.  Here are some of the "gems" I selected over the years:

• Super Mario Brothers
  
• Wagons East and Canadian Bacon
  
• Waterworld
  
• Drop Dead Fred
  
• Citizen Ruth (caveat - for my 12 year old brother)
  
• The Cable Guy
• Batman and Robin

Now granted, most of my worst choices were back in the days before internet rating systems and review sites were in place.  We'd usually wander around in a Blockbuster video store and pick movies that looked like they might appeal to the family.  I just know, if left to my own devices, I tend to choose films on the crappier side of the scale.

Given this knowledge, how can I best use my powers for the good of all mankind? By simultaneously warning and entertaining others of the perils of these crappy movies!  And what better way to do it than in the most succinct format known to humanity today - the 140 character tweet!

I'd like to introduce to you my alter-ego, TheCrapCritic, who can be found anywhere that bad movies and media exist.  Through this account, I'll distill the essence of a crappy film, book, commercial, television show, or other media down into a pithy, 1-tweet "review".  I can't promise a regular schedule because even I won't voluntarily subject myself to these crappy products - but you can bet with my unerring ability to choose the crap that I'll have plenty to post.  Here a couple of my more recent "reviews":

• SURROGATES: The actors portray surrogate robots. They do a great job - it's like a bad screenplay being read aloud by your computer. #crap
  
• DEATH RACE: Where Jason Statham wears a metal mask and drives a Mustang with guns attached. Viewers are advised to wear blindfolds. #crap
  
• If Jet Li spent as much time practicing his acting as he did his martial arts, Kiss of the Dragon might have been a better movie. #crap
  

If you're on Twitter, come follow TheCrapCritic for more along the same lines.  I'm just getting started over there so there's not much of a backlog, but the crap will out, so it's just a matter of time...